I've had a crash refresher course in home and life management. I'm using a lot of notes to figure the answers out though. I'm updating ways of doing things little by little so they fit my new household of one. The timing of when utilities are paid and how utilities are paid is going to be different. I'm trying to move things to electronic payment as much as I can. It's a work in progress.
I found a couple big "oofs". My additional life insurance cancelled for non-payment of premium. I was gobsmacked. Ahh, a credit card number changed and there was not a system update. I'm in process of getting that reinstated. I want the kids to have security, particularly the youngest as she'd have no parental back up, should something happen to me before she's truly launched. This policy is locked in the rate until I'm 69. After that, I'm not sure what I'll add for additional term if anything.
It's all so ridiculously expensive. The same policy on the day I turn 69 goes from $50 per month to over $600. I've time to research. I learned Colonial Penn is pretty minimal coverage. At $10 per month for a mere $1600 in coverage, I'd be better off directly giving the kids money to put in a Roth. What I have in my whole life, plus what's going to be in savings, will be a nice legacy, I hope, after my final expenses are covered as my house is paid for, and no other debt.
I mishandled the best way to deal with my daughter and our taxes. I paid in nearly $700 more than I was anticipating, though that might not have to do with my bobble. Our accountant helped me to file without an extension so that's not hanging over me. We've got a plan to do an amended return for both her and I this summer that will improve our returns cumulatively. Next year we'll schedule early and catch these things.
Then there's stupid actions. On Wednesday, I pulled the garbage and recycling bins back up. I didn't even pay attention that the recycling truck hadn't even been through yet! I was surprised to see it pull in an hour later, two hours later than normal time. There's room for the next weeks materials as I don't have much, but that was just dumb.
But I had some solo navigation successes too. I started the process for tuning up and getting his boat ready for summer. I finally got his private savings shifted to me so I can make those funds available to my kids. This was money from his grandmother, so I feel strongly it is to go to the kids. It took 9 weeks of red tape though for what should have been a simple close, cashier's check, and deposit. I've got grooming and veterinarian visits scheduled for pup. We've got boarding set up from grandpup and my niece as sitter for pup for daughter's graduation weekend. She can come and go as needed with pup, but couldn't with the young dog.
I managed the movers for a piano from my friend's house to mine. It's sort of DD2's graduation gift as moving pianos is hugely expensive. Music comforts her and while I do little more than tap at keys, I've played a bit on it too. It's ridiculously fitted into my living room, a room too small for the amount of furniture now with the piano and the TV and stand ( because we still prefer to not watch in the family room), but I don't care. I managed to get another deposit in a Roth account for 2022 before the deadline.
My to do list is plenty long and seems to grow daily. But, I'm doing something. I'm getting at least one thing done a day even if it's something I dread.
I think the room looks great! It looks like “home” if that makes sense, and a place I could relax and enjoy. Love the piano! Cindy in the South
ReplyDeleteYou are doing amazingly Sam. I'm so full of admiration for you (although I never doubted you for a second)!
ReplyDeleteI ended up with a piano in the hallway under the spiral staircase for 2 yrs. I put my bills due (even auto pay because sometimes as Son2 has found they don't always go through and get paid) on a wall calendar. Son2 now uses he phone calendar to remind him to check after work.
ReplyDeleteWe have old sheets, towels and blankets for Charlotte on EVERYTHING LOL
Preplan your own funeral /gravesite etc and prepay. Saved us untold amount of stress over Daddy, drove Brother and I insane (both us got sick from the stress) as Mother had nothing done at all.
I second you on pre-planning/paying your own funeral. I have already paid for mine and my kids just have just one phone call to make as and when - and then other people take over the harder bits. I did this when my brother died suddenly and unexpectedly and it is a relief to know that I have done what I can!
DeleteI think you have done great tackling all that stuff. Please don't beat yourself up over any small oofs. Isn't the cost of life insurance crazy? We ended up dropping one policy when dh turned 55 last year as it tripled in cost.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations to your daughter on her graduation. I'm sure it has been hard to finish this semester. Love the piano, and I know that playing it will bring her some comfort and maybe some comfort for you too. I can understand needing someplace to relax (maybe without having to see the empty chair?) and your living room looks comfy with a spot for the pups and you.
Sending hugs.
I added furniture to my living room from my parents home. There's too much in there now, but it works for me and it feels cozy. Yours works for you and it looks very cozy. Home is best however we make it. I think you're doing great at all this heavy lifting.
ReplyDeleteI love a home with a piano. There's just something special about it.
ReplyDeleteI admire you
ReplyDeleteIn these darkest of days you are still living your life, making your kids a priority, trying to find a new normal when all you want is your old life back
This post made
me think of Lois Tonkins grief model
-
How grief doesn’t get smaller , but life grows around it
Ans like others have said , your room looks comforting
When can I visit for a coffee ?
Siobhan x
Hey lovely lady, glad to see you are going so well. Good on you for getting all this life stuff done while not feeling your best. You are doing really well, even though you might not always be recognise it. Megan.
ReplyDeleteWe cancelled our 20 year term life insurance when it skyrocketed after the 20 year mark. We had originally taken it out to cover the mortgage should one of us pass before it was paid off. Now we don't need it, but I've been considering a policy just to cover funeral expenses.
ReplyDeleteFind somewhere you can prepay your funeral costs now. Then you don't have to worry abut funeral insurance(rip off?)nor having the savings to cover your funeral.....especially if you don't have long term care insurance and one of you ends up in a ltc facility.
DeleteI think you're doing amazingly well. Your room looks so cosy and inviting. The piano is the perfect fit, too. xxx
ReplyDeleteJre I think your room looks so comfy! Although it’s hard, let go of any financial boo boo as how can you function with that kind of grief? I know I talk big because I made several life altering mistakes when my husband died that still give me anxiety 28 years later. I didn’t file taxes for two years, was so overwhelmed!!!!!! And my husband was a farmer, the complexity of family farm with his brothers that now I believe really undercut and had me sign over things of significant value (my son farms now and knows these things, he was my oldest and only 15 then). I started filing my simple employment taxes after that but the IRS does catch up and garnish! Part of it was in 97 we had a terrible flood and my tax papers forms… were destroyed (but I digress I went numb and folded! But that didn’t help!) then I invested 50,000 in an ethanol plant that went bankrupt, then kept ignoring a corn stock payment cause I didn’t know how to fund/pay and they foreclosed on that which cost me dearly through out the years and I still can’t really forgive myself for that one. So I do understand, you’re doing great!
ReplyDeleteOne step at a time. Thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteThe room looks cozy and like home. You are doing well.
ReplyDeleteHubs was in the insurance game so if you need advice, lmk and I can ask him. It sounds like you want to use insurance to leave your kids a "legacy". You might be better off investing(if even CD or something, not stock market)the $$ you'd spend on insurance instead if you have no debts. Hugs!
ReplyDeleteHow I wish I could play an instrument. I think, you are doing great. Take care and be well.
ReplyDeleteYou are crushing it. Learning how to do new things is difficult enough, not to mention doing it during a time of grief and substantial life change. What a lovely graduation gift for your daughter. I know she's quite musically inclined, so I'm sure it will be a comfort to her to have a piano at the house.
ReplyDeleteGood for you! Persevere and learn and one gets a lot done.
ReplyDeleteYou are really doing well. This is definitely a learning time - for EVERYTHING. Having to do something the first time is always scary. We face a lot of firsts through this kind of experience.
ReplyDeleteJust keep plugging away - you learn with each step.
Take care.
You’ve gotten so much accomplished, Sam. Kudos to you for tackling all these tasks. One thing a day is a good goal to strive for.
ReplyDelete