How Not to Get a New Wardrobe

I can't for the life of me figure out how this happened.  I dressed very casually for work yesterday after three previous days of suit meetings, and knowing I was pretty much desk bound and wanted to be comfortable.  I dropped DD#2 at school but had to head back in as she forgot her math book in the car, of course noticed only after she had headed in the school to her orchestra 0 hour class, I parked and ran her book in, leaving at the student office.  I drove to work, shifting uncomfortably, then realized I left my phone in my back pocket, causing the lopsidedness .  I reached in at a light, and pulled it out, not really noticing anything wrong.  I drive to work, parked and when I left the car, I felt a smart of cold up on my behind. What the *%%&*! I thought, fearing something else was going on.  I scurried to the bathroom, fortunately no one behind or ahead of me.  I gasped in the stall to see that not only did I have a rip, it was the full length of my derriere, not even on a seam. I took my top layer sweater off, and wrapped around my waist, making an interesting skirt, and buzzed over to Target.  

My plan had been to find a simple black pair of leggings, and make due with the sweater I had on. I couldn't find any, but did find black yoga pants. They looked very athletic, so I thought to just buy an inexpensive long sweater or tunic to make it look less athletic wear. Then I noticed a sweater bonanza.  Racks and Racks of sweaters, all 40% off. I chose a long black one, and on way to checking out, I passed another rack that had just the right shade of tan I was hoping to find to supplement another season of all my brown tone skirts.  Well that one went in the basket as well.  I paid changed, and was in my desk only 25 minutes later than I normally start. 

It stinks about the jeans because these were a great fitting, comfortable pair that any woman who struggles with finding jeans can appreciate.Their less than a year old-my only jeans purchase of 2015, and now I either need to replace, or make due again with the other two ancient pairs, neither that fit like these do.  My daughter suggested I wear with a pair of flannel pajama pants underneath, or better, take an old pair and sew into the jeans as a lining.  Visions of 1990's grunge bands popped into my head. Looking like an old female member of Pearl Jam is not going to work.  Any ideas on what could be done with these to repurpose? 

I believe I managed to salvage my dignity, and didn't expose myself to anyone.  It might have been a bit humiliating if the rip happened before dropping the book off though, without me knowing, and perhaps it did. When I was telling the story, I asked my daughter if anyone commented on her embarrassing mother. "No," she said, "but we're all used to parents being embarrassing." Thank you child.