Sunday, June 11, 2017

Stormy Sunday- A Life Analogy

We've had sweltering heat all week and unseasonably high humidity. It is not surprising that there is a severe thunderstorm warning, and the rain and winds have already picked up. It is moving quickly, 60 miles per hour, so we should see a break in an hour or so, just in time to drive to Minneapolis for DD2's concert. Storms are supposed to pick up again around supper time/late afternoon-early evening. My walk may need a rain check. I was hoping to have the French Open finals on while puttering around the house this morning, but the satellite is knocked out, so might miss it. 

I don't like the destructive potential of storms, but I find the change up in the weather sort of invigorating. Hearing the winds and the patter of the water against the windows and against the rain gutter has an interesting rhythm, sounds to shake up the atmosphere. Things have been too static, too calm, the heat slowly rising each day, storm conditions brewing until the moment that they burst. Furniture and other loose items were secured this morning; I brought in my one hanging basket so it wouldn't get beaten up by the wind and rain.

I feel like my life is a lot like a stormy weather pattern. Maybe I'm a bit of a pessimist, though  I like to think of myself more as a pragmatist. Right now, things are right with my family. DH and I and both our adult children are employed, the kids paying their bills and living in nice, safe homes, with healthy friendships. DD2 is healthy, busy with her friends, making good choices and avoiding much of the teen angst and drama that might be easy to get sucked into. For now, DH's mother is healthy, having come back from a wonderful trip to Ireland, she is ready to have a pleasant summer with her family in the new cabin. 

Here is where my pragmatic nature comes in. I know while things are good right now, there are a few situations that are always simmering. I am thinking ahead as to how, if the the storms hit, I do my best to secure the furniture and take the metaphorical plants into the house before the rain and winds come. Call me a helicopter parent if you will, but not only do I make sure we are living below our means (aggressive savings goals aside), I take into account the ability to help out my children financially, at least in the short term, should either have an unforeseen  hit. Unfortunately, DS has had a few of these over his last 5 1/2 years of being out of college. However, these finical storms has made him each time step up his efforts, making changes, to combat the instability of his earning cycle. 

As with DH's family, it feels like there is always an underlying tension. His siblings drink too much at the lake, and while neither of his siblings are particularly tactful with their opinions when sober, all filters are shut off when either is drunk. Add that to their nastiness the next day when under a hangover, it can be really awful for me to be around them. This year, I simply refuse to expose myself to it, and at the first sign of  discomfort, I plan to exit. I'm particularly concerned though about my almost 20 year old nephew.  While it is legal for him to have a drink with his parents at home, I saw him consume beer after beer memorial day weekend, very out of character for him. It's not my place to say anything, but eight years ago, they were all so concerned when his older sister turned 21 and the effect her drinking around him would have. Now, apparently it is the family past time, condoned even though he is under age. My BIL should be concerned as his oldest is almost 14, and pays attention to everything his older boy cousin does. While not my place to intervene in my husbands family dynamics, where it may impact my kid, I will be practical. I'm not naive enough to think DD2 won't be exposed to underage drinking, but we've had very direct conversations with her on our expectations and severe consequences of underage (and irresponsible) drinking. She will not be in a boat captained by my BIL when under the influence, and I will not hesitate to tell her why. 

While I've written this, there is a break in the weather at least where I am, and the storm front has headed east. The satellite is back just as Rafael Nadal  won the French Open in straight sets, having not lost a single set the entire tournament. Right now, the storms have passed, but they'll most likely be back before I know it.


  1. Nice metaphor !

    I miss proper storms here in the desert.

    1. I've read my post again and think I really didn't capture what I was going for. Thanks for getting what I was trying for.

  2. My mother would not allow any drinking in our home. And, we were rarely at uncles' and aunts' houses because there was too much drinking. I got what you were saying.

    1. A couple beers, some nice wine, a cocktail or two, I'm not a pride. I just don't get adults with children at a family place drinking to intoxication, regularly.


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