What's the date? July 13th? DH has been on a weird shopping kick this month. My tight , but manageable $64 a week spending goal has been totally derailed and we have now spent $280. Now granted, I did a Trader Joe's stop, and that can be a budget buster, but in just the last week alone, H has spent $130 on miscellaneous groceries, and I am really not sure how to make meals for the rest of the month. There are some household things we still need, laundry soap and toilet paper, so most likely I am left with $60 to try and hit my $350 mini challenge. The funny thing is, DH is aware of my challenge and thought he was helping. Isn't buying three boxes of toaster pastries for $5.00 a savings win?
Here's the deal. We both have a thrifty mentality and have mutual goals for where we want to spend the bulk of our money. He fully supports my mini challenges. The difference though, is when he decides he wants something, he will go ahead and buy rather than do without, rationalizing that because we save in other areas, it all evens out. If he is off on Thursday and decides he wants a meal of country style BBQ ribs, corn bread, and grilling beans, he's going to go to the store and buy the ingredients. He wouldn't just make BBQ chicken, already in the freezer, with drop biscuits, ingredients on hand, and plain pork and beans from the pantry shelf. this doesn't happen that often, like it did this past Thursday, but when it does, the $20 he was going to spend turns into $45 as he pops the "deals" into the cart as well. He's doubly pleased with himself, because he saved the cost of going out for BBQ, and he stockpiled a few items at loss leader prices. I on the other hand in a challenge month might first plan from what was already in the house. Trader Joe's aside, I try and buy exactly what we need to supplement what we already have with meal prep in mind. Even at Trader Joe's, my splurges were items like basmati rice, which they don't have at my Aldi, herbed goat cheese, which we love on a salad, freezer, ready meal lo mein for hectic nights and roasted tomato basil soup (again only found there).
We both plan for big purchases, not just running out an replacing something as soon as we decide we want something. Often we both underestimate what the cost of something is going to be,the new floors and appliances case in point. Not shopping a lot, I get sticker shock. He'll research and research to see if he can find lower cost options, and once convinced he won't, he is ready to buy. Right then. I on the other hand, would still rather pause, keep putting the money aside, and keep doing without. Neither is completely right or wrong, since we are not going into debt. On the appliance front, I have to tip to DH's approach, because I'd still be s trying to sock money away for the floors and appliances instead of enjoying them, though tapping into savings. he is more comfortable with the fluidity of savings and monthly cash flow than I am. Yet, he is more likely to pay the bills, and leave as little in the check book as he thinks we'll need, and making as large a deposit into the savings account as possible. I like to leave a more substantial cushion on the check book as I hate transferring money out of savings once it has been put there (saving priorities aside.)
It's Saturday, and I'm staying home, cleaning, doing laundry, and devoting a few hours to writing. DH's best friend's dad passed away right before the 4th of July and the memorial and gathering is later today, so we will be there. Perhaps we'll stop for a drink after, but otherwise today a low or no spend day (not counting the charitable donation.) We're going to the lake tomorrow and I have chicken for the grill, both pasta and green salad ingredients, and will make a pan of brownies. I'm making due with the laundry soap, and think I can get the two loads I wanted done rather than make a trip out. Some might read my little tricks to try and manage my spending, my rants about DH's spending, and think I am buzz kill and could lighten up. Maybe I could, but I admittedly for day to day living, have very few wants so don't see the need to spend if not needed. If my worst complaint about my spouse is he shops erratically and likes to move money around our accounts, I guess I really shouldn't complain at all.
Saturday, July 13, 2019
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Your hubby and mine sound identical in terms of how they spend money - especially on groceries and big things. I am the squirrel. I stockup, only buy on sale. Hubby gets it in his head he wants to make a gourmet meal and goes to the most expensive store to buy the ingredients not on sale. I do try and prevent this as much as possible - if he says he wants to cook I make him give me a list and I go get what we need (from cheapest store and make some substitutions). At least we have spouses that try and participate in the meal prep
ReplyDeleteI usually am unaware when and what Thursday he will decide he wants to cook. Sometimes I leave work and think, great, he'll have started something for dinner, and then I'll get home to nothing. When he does cook-it never seems to be what we already have.
DeleteIt seems you both have the same goal and different ways to get there. He really is trying. Maybe you can not mention the challenges so he won't feel the sudden urge to help.
ReplyDeleteI like this-"get off my team!"
DeleteAt least your DH tries to participate. Mine was diagnosed bipolar and super-spending is one of their traits. I kept trying to rein it in but to no avail. I used to spend probably €200-250 per week on groceries when we were 5 living at home. I was in hospital for a week and he spent €600 and it took 3 carts to load that stuff up - stuff which we didn't have room to store at home. Quite through the grapevine I heard from son no. 2 this week that ex is training to become a school bus driver (because he can't make it on $8,000/month pension - and the gf works!!!!)! It boggles my mind!
ReplyDeleteWell, school bus drivers are in short supply, so at least he will be contributing to societal needs! $8,000 is a darn nice pension.
DeleteOur husbands our similar. :-) Mine also has the combined "we must have all of the fruits & vegetables in the fridge" mindset. Fruit & veggies are healthy, of course, but in his mind, if we buy all of them, people will sub out for other, less healthy options. To a point, this is totally true, but you hit diminshing returns pretty quickly. I, on the other hand, love an empty fridge before going grocery shopping. It totally freaks him out, & he'll go to Costco multiple times a week if it means avoiding being "out" of something.
ReplyDeleteMy clean and empty fridge is a distant memory already! Fortunately, we don't do Costco-that would be a whole other post.
DeleteAt the beginning of the year, I adopted Sluggy's WAM (walking around money) idea. Hubby and I each get an allowance of $200 each to spend or save however we like. Since I hate cooking, most of mine is spent on eating out. I used to food shop with only a certain amount of cash and I'd get frustrated because I'd never have enough to stock up on good sales. Now I use a CC and pay it off each month plus I get points that I can use to pay the CC balance or buy something else. I'm able to stock up on sale items that I know we use on a regular basis. I spend more, but I'm not at the store as often, which for me is a win.
ReplyDeleteWe should perhaps do the WAM money thing, and when it is gone, it is gone. We also get a nice return on CC points, so I always can stock up when something is super low. But things like Pasta are always going on sale or are as cheap everyday at Aldi as the stock up sale, so buying 10 boxes to clog my pantry seems point less.
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