Prepaid postage, money orders, passport photos, pages and pages of papers. My daughter is getting a crash course this week on all things needed before she goes to Spain in the fall. Of course memory dims, but I don't recall the process being so challenging when my older daughter got her UK student visa. One, she didn't have to travel to a UK Consulate and could do things by mail. Both though have very specific timing needs. You can't get too early, and if there's an error, the process needs to start again. She had to confirm her Friday appointment, had 2 days to do so, and if she misses for any reason, she must wait three months to try again.
It'll be a great experience for her. But I'm annoyed to be honest about some of both her procrastination and a bit of playing ignorant. She's repeatedly said, I've never done anything like this before. Well, neither have I really for her specific itinerary. Yet, she's sat in multiple meetings with advisors and reference material is available. She just needed to do it.
DH and I were quite ignorant as well about things. We made an awful lot of mistakes I'm sure. His parents with him were very sink or swim, and kind of nudgy about how he did things after the fact. I just jumped into things myself because I never wanted to add any burden to my parents lives. As a parent of adult children, it's a balancing act. Things are more complex and mistakes seem more costly than when I was young. But, they still need to do the tasks themselves. Having a safety net in our parents is all well and good, but as we know, at some point the net is gone as our parents age and pass away.
She ran her errands, was intimidated by it all, but completed it all herself. The woman at the post office was completely clueless what she needed, so that has to be fixed, but she'll do that tomorrow when regular workers are on shift. She's got all she needs in a master folder, ready for Friday. Adulting success.
I am sure covid has not helped the VISA situation either - the school should offer a PDF on the process too (maybe they ought to)! Glad it is all sorted but you're right, cannot procrastinate forever.
ReplyDeleteThey do, and had she not needed her passport back in May, they could have done in a group.
DeleteOof! Do you guys do a 10 year passport in the US? We do in Canada and I am SO glad I have one, hopefully when I need to renew it won't be as messy as it is right now
DeleteYes, it's good for 10 years, but really only 9.5 because most countries require 6 months left on the dates. She, DH, and I renewed in spring 2018 I think. My older daughter might need hers renewed next year, and son in 2016.
DeleteParenting an adult child is so different from parenting.a child. When to step in and help and when to back off and let them handle it is a learning process. I wish you all the very best. Her adventure sounds exciting.
ReplyDeleteIt's is so different because you can only advise but once 18, they are on their own.
DeleteMy parents were sink or swim types as well but luckily I had a very close relationship with both sets of Grandparents which to this day I say was my saving grace.
ReplyDeleteIt's good that you're there for her even if a bit trying at times.
There's just so much that could go wrong, and hard to fix if not accurate.
DeleteI cannot imagine the bureaucracy to do what you two are doing. I wonder if this is done to discourage going abroad.
ReplyDeleteIt's definitely to ensure a person is going to leave again! She's got all she needs, so hopefully it really is all she needs.
DeleteJumping through hoops is the new normal with visas.
ReplyDeleteI bet your son and DIL has had to do a fair bit with their professions. Fingers crossed all will be well.
DeleteI remember having no clue how to adult and absolutely no help. IT was painful and difficult. I see my youngest being a lot more laid back about things that she needs to pay attention to. I think all parents do a little more for the baby. At least we did. But now she has to step up.
ReplyDeleteOh my, do I know what you mean. She's so laid back- until she's not. She procrastinates some pretty big things. It's bit her once or twice but not enough to change her habits.
DeleteYour kids are so lucky to have you helping along. My folks were always very "hands off" with us - we had to sink or swim! Line-ups, waits and bureaucracy have been rampant for travelers lately here in Canada too. I don't plan on leaving the country for at least another year!
ReplyDeleteShe's nervous now because she got the confirmation email, thought she confirmed her appointment, but has no verification of her verification. It's all very scary for her if it wasn't done correctly.
DeleteI know things are more complicated now than when I was young. I know the requirements for a visa certainly are.
ReplyDeleteIn countries that only allow 90 days in a 6 month period, it's got to be timed right.
DeleteIt can be intimidating to deal with bureaucracy when one is young. I am sure, your daughter has learnt a lot and she will feel more confident next time around.
ReplyDeleteOnce the appointment is done, she'll feel relief. Well, maybe once it's back in her possession.
DeleteWhere is your daughter going to in Spain? It's a wonderful country, with lovely people. It will be worth the effort!
ReplyDeleteI'm being vague intentionally in blog world. Not knowing how weird some people can be, and knowing nothing about suze if communities, I'm not saying her specifics. But, she'll have a great experience.
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